It was a Saturday morning in March over 30 years ago. Robin found herself sitting in a small room with several other women she didn’t know. Uncomfortable not just because she was in a thin hospital gown with several strangers, all who were looking down and silent, but because she was scared and hopeless regarding her circumstance and what was about to happen.
Just about a month earlier, Robin found out she was pregnant. She was single and 21. She worked two jobs, one at a bar so that she could pay her rent and continue making payments on a new sports car she bought herself. Her relationship with her parents was complicated and the father of the child was someone else’s boyfriend.
“I was a complete mess,” reminisced Robin.
Robin considered all of her options and actually first began to believe that this child was exactly what she needed.
“I didn’t know how it would work,” shared Robin. “But the thought of having a baby gave me hope that the love I so longed to give and receive would be found in becoming a mother.”
Robin began to plan and dream about all the possibilities, but as soon as the dreaming began the realities dropped hard into her lap. Taking inventory of her life, she concluded she was in no way prepared or able to care for a child. She couldn’t even make ends meet. On top of it the child’s father’s response was, “Get rid of it!”
“I felt alone and my choices were very limited,” Robin said quietly. “I didn’t believe that I could go through with adoption and I didn’t feel confident that I could parent on my own. As I sat by myself one morning on the end of my bed, I remember feeling hopelessness and deep sadness as I came to believe that abortion was my only real option.”
In that clinic room 30 years ago, Robin and the other women believed the lies of abortion and were convinced that this procedure was the best answer to their “problems.” How different the outcome could have been for Robin and these women and their children had they experienced counsel and care that was rooted in God’s love and Truth.
Robin explains, “Perhaps I would have made the same choice but I can’t help but think that had I known the truths about abortion – that my baby was not just a clump of cells but a life ordained by God, that my pregnancy was not merely an accident but something that had passed through His sovereign hand, that my abortion wasn’t just a simple procedure to solve a problem but the source of a deep sorrow and a heavy shame I would carry for decades, that I wasn’t alone in my circumstance – I might have made a different decision.”
Robin’s story is a similar story for millions of women and men around the globe. In the U.S., nearly 43% of women of childbearing age have experienced an elective abortion (along with the men involved.)
There is no way to know if Robin’s life would have taken a different course, but there is great value in making fully informed decisions in loving community and especially when made through a Biblical lens. This is where the body of Christ and organizations like Assure Women’s Centers can offer information, compassion, and care to women who are making life-altering decisions. Women (and men) should not walk through these decisions alone.
One way that we, as the church, can help to alleviate abortion is to support organizations that support women and their babies in very tangible ways. Contributing financially to the mission and providing much needed items like diapers, car seats, clothing, and all the things that moms and babies need in those first years are crucial to give women with unplanned pregnancies the information they need to choose life, the hope that they can care for their child if they choose to parent, and the assurance that they are not walking alone.
“There’s a good chance that 1 out of 3 women you know are carrying the incredible secret burden of heartache, shame, and guilt that lends itself to depression, addictions, and isolation,” Robin shared. “Maybe this is your story. If it is or if you know someone who lives in the painful shadow of abortion, know that there is great hope for healing and restoration through Jesus!”
Through God’s power and the testimony of post-abortive women whose lives and stories were redeemed by Jesus Christ for God’s Glory, Robin was able to begin a healing journey. Lies were replaced by truth for Robin that included who she is in Christ, who God is, and what He truly thinks of her. Robin was able to experience healing and transformation and has walked with other women who have received the same. With joy, Robin stated,
“I have truly been set free from the shame and guilt I carried around for nearly 20 years, I have found new hope and purpose as God has shown me through His word and by the power of His Holy Spirit that He can use even me in His redemptive plan for all of creation. My hope is that all will seek peace and restoration in Jesus Christ.”
Robin’s hope is if there is anyone reading this story who’s contemplating elective abortion, that you would reach out to someone you trust or meet with someone at a crisis pregnancy center.
“You are not alone and there is hope and help for you and your child,” exclaimed Robin. “I pray that we, as the Church, will have mercy and compassion on those who have experienced the trauma of abortion, walking alongside them as Jesus heals and restores them and that we would also be a people that extends great grace to those who find themselves in an unexpected pregnancy so that they are not alone in making a decision that honors God and preserves and celebrates both their life and the life within them.”
If you are looking for a safe place to share your struggle, whether you are carrying the burden of a past abortion or are considering one now, please contact Assure Women’s Center, reach out to someone you trust, or email Robin at surrenderingthesecret.robin@gmail.com.
“I know where you are, and I want to walk with you,” Robin said with seriousness. “You are not alone.”
This story is one out of a three-part series to draw attention to Assure Women’s Center. One way to save lives and build families is to support organizations that help women make the best choices for themselves and their babies. From now until May 9, please consider donating to Assure’s boutique for women who attend classes put on by the center that helps equip them for their parenting journey. Download the Assure Women's Center Donation Drive Needs List.
If you would like to hear more of Robin's story, listen to Episode 7 of the Reclaiming Hope podcast, Abortion - Robin's Story.